As she was smoking her cigarette, looking into the sun
enjoying the last strokes of warmth it gave her. Enjoying ever little burn in
her lungs. Finally, she could let go, her head finally stopped pounding her
shaking hands finally calmed down and she knew this wasn`t supposed to be, she
knew that that girl wasn`t herself anymore.
She finally understood why people
need this so badly, she finally knew what it feels like to need that little sweet
escape. As the smoke sourrounded her, she started thinking… what brought her this
deep.
She was the funny, sporty girl and right now she would be running or
dancing just moving her body to escape but she was to tired, it was just too
much. She needed something heavier, something that burned like the fire she
felt inside, something that hopefully would make her feel alive again. She was
despreatly searching for help knowing no one could help her right now.
She felt
broke inside, she didn`t feel like this in a long time. She was sad before but
it was a different kind of sad, this time it was so desperate so incapable she
didn`t know how to do anything in that moment other than be confused by who she
became and what life can do to you.
She finally woke up and realized the pink
world she was living in, came crashing down on her. With every breath she took,
looking at the smoke bust out of her rosy lips, it got worse.
